The danger and opportunity of that scary thing you’re not sharing…

Andrew Horn
2 min readMay 10, 2023

They say “the truth shall set you free.”

That’s only half of it.

I met a new friend recently. Within an hour of connecting, he shared something deeply vulnerable with me.

It was something he hasn’t spoken to many people about and I felt honored to hold it for him.

Our shame tries to convince us that sharing these “big secrets” will push people away.

In reality, it often does the opposite. It builds trust and make people feel more connected to us.

This was also his girlfriends experience after he first shared it with her.

When we are withholding the truth.

We trap ourselves in a prison of our own creation.

Bars molded by the belief that we aren’t safe to be ourselves.

Walls built with the fear that we’ll be abandoned if people knew the real us.

We strip ourselves of the freedom to simply be who we are.

Remember this…

You re not alone. Everybody has their thing.

We all know the feeling of hiding something we feel people would just not understand or accept us for.

And more importantly…

When we hide our “big secret”, we are subconsciously modeling that everyone else needs to hide theirs too.

Do we want the people we love to feel like they need to hide the real version of themselves around us?

Do we want our friends or family members to live and maybe even die with their truth inside?

I certainly don’t.

I want to be a lighthouse for my friends authenticity and deepest truth.

That’s why I make a point to express those scary thoughts and share those big secrets.

To me, that’s the only way I can truly show my people that it is safe.

That’s why I relate to sharing these big secrets an act of service.

“The truth shall set you free.”

Is really…

“The truth shall set you free…and your people too.”

So, share the thing.

For yourself.

And also, the people you care about.



Andrew Horn

Founder // - Spreading gratitude and meaningful human connection in the world — prev. @dreamsforkidsdc and @abilitylist.